How to Care for Your Introvert
Being an introvert, I've faced numerous bouts of criticism and cynical comments over the years accusing me of being rude, obnoxious, and even demanding that I need to just "man up". My introversion isn't a manifestation of fear or anxiety; it's just who I am. Undoubtedly, you're bound to know at least one introvert (we aren't as rare as you might think, plus, sometimes we really do leave our homes), and so I've devised a list of ways that you can be a true friend for your introvert.
The Oxford dictionary describes an introvert as a "shy, reticent person". Well, the Oxford dictionary is wrong. Rather, for once, the Urban dictionary provides a more accurate description: "A person who is energized by spending time alone. Often found in their homes, libraries, quiet parks that not many people know about, or other secluded places, introverts like to think and be alone."
1. Accept their introversion
You cannot change an introvert into an extrovert, or vice versa. You. Can. Not. Change. Anyone. If you're friends with an individual then you must accept their personality type as it is. If you cannot do this then please, get some new friends. Accept that your introvert may not always want to go out and may often become exhausted by social interaction (yes. physically fatigued). Accept that this isn't because they don't want to be with you, they just need that time alone to recuperate.
2. Give them time alone
3. Realise they aren't loners
Aha, mildly contradictory, yet this makes total sense in an introvert's head. We may not always want to go out, but being invited does mean a lot. We don't always want to be alone. In fact, we really do appreciate invitations because then we don't feel like a hindrance to you. There may be times when we hide away for months on end, ie "hibernation", but we won't stay hidden under that shell forever, I promise. Introverts need some alone time, but not social exclusion.
4. Take interest
Believe it or not, introverts can talk a heck of a lot if given the right topic. In fact, many introverts face extroverted feeling (particularly INFJ's) and so can sense the mood - yes, we are aware that you don't care whatsoever about how ridiculous the cliffhanger to that book is, but it is important to us, more important than any gossip or
5. Tea
The key to any introvert's heart. If they like coffee then.. do not associate with them. All jokes aside, find out what makes your introvert feel comfortable. Sometimes external stimuli is overwhelming and we just need to not feel so suffocated by society and life. Don't take it personally. Blankets help too.
6. Number six. Be an honest friend. Befriend an introvert, make your way into their heart, and I assure you, you will have a space there forever.
The Oxford dictionary describes an introvert as a "shy, reticent person". Well, the Oxford dictionary is wrong. Rather, for once, the Urban dictionary provides a more accurate description: "A person who is energized by spending time alone. Often found in their homes, libraries, quiet parks that not many people know about, or other secluded places, introverts like to think and be alone."
1. Accept their introversion
You cannot change an introvert into an extrovert, or vice versa. You. Can. Not. Change. Anyone. If you're friends with an individual then you must accept their personality type as it is. If you cannot do this then please, get some new friends. Accept that your introvert may not always want to go out and may often become exhausted by social interaction (yes. physically fatigued). Accept that this isn't because they don't want to be with you, they just need that time alone to recuperate.
2. Give them time alone
This may seem contradictory to "being a friend", as typically friends are expected to spend time together and talk lotsandlotsandlots, but introverts need some time to "re-fuel" after social time. Believe it or not, socialising is exhausting for us introverts. Alone time doesn't mean we're sad, or that anything is wrong, in fact, often we find it comforting to have a bit of time on our own. By allowing your introvert to have some time to themselves, you're doing an important thing for your friendship.
3. Realise they aren't loners
Aha, mildly contradictory, yet this makes total sense in an introvert's head. We may not always want to go out, but being invited does mean a lot. We don't always want to be alone. In fact, we really do appreciate invitations because then we don't feel like a hindrance to you. There may be times when we hide away for months on end, ie "hibernation", but we won't stay hidden under that shell forever, I promise. Introverts need some alone time, but not social exclusion.
4. Take interest
Believe it or not, introverts can talk a heck of a lot if given the right topic. In fact, many introverts face extroverted feeling (particularly INFJ's) and so can sense the mood - yes, we are aware that you don't care whatsoever about how ridiculous the cliffhanger to that book is, but it is important to us, more important than any gossip or
5. Tea
The key to any introvert's heart. If they like coffee then.. do not associate with them. All jokes aside, find out what makes your introvert feel comfortable. Sometimes external stimuli is overwhelming and we just need to not feel so suffocated by society and life. Don't take it personally. Blankets help too.
6. Number six. Be an honest friend. Befriend an introvert, make your way into their heart, and I assure you, you will have a space there forever.
Comments
Post a Comment